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Young Writers' Competition

Winner, nine-eleven year-olds category and overall winner

Survivor!
by
Eden Gray

It had been raining all weekend and I had been so bored. The rain had started at Friday teatime, just as we came out of the chip shop, and it was still raining now on Monday morning.
‘Better put your wellies on for school,’ Mum said, and I groaned. I hate my Wellingtons, they’re pink with coloured dots and had been a present from my Auntie Sheila. I used to think she had good taste.
‘Oh, and have you fed your fish?’ she added, bending down to put Fliss’ collar on. Fliss, my puppy, was dancing around excitedly knowing she was going for a walk. I went over to the fish bowl and looked in.
Freckles, my goldfish, blew a stream of bubbles up to me in greeting. I sprinkled a pinch of food on top of the water and he sped to the surface and played Pacman with the floating flakes. I’d won him at the fair by throwing ping-pong balls into a jam jar. He was quite handsome as fish went, orange, with a long tail and seven tiny black spots on his nose, which is why I had called him Freckles. My dad didn’t think he would last the night, but six months later he was still swimming. Freckles and I often had long conversations together – he would come up to the surface of the bowl and open and close his mouth and I would do the same. He never said anything very interesting though.
‘Bye Freckles,’ I said, putting the lid on the food and went to get the dreaded wellies.
By the time school ended the rain had flooded the playground. I splashed through the deep puddles, some of them were too high for my Wellingtons and I got a soggy foot.
At home I saw from my bedroom window that the stream at the bottom of the garden had turned into a river and our garden was lost under swirly brown water. Branches and plastic bags floated over Mum’s roses and I heard Mum on the telephone asking Dad to come home early. I thought it was a good job Dad was a strong swimmer.
By the time he arrived home the water was seeping through the back door. Mum told me to take Fliss upstairs and to stay in my bedroom. Downstairs I could hear them moving furniture and bringing things upstairs.
‘Don’t forget Freckles,’ I called from the top of the stairs, watching two feet of water swoosh around the legs of the dining room table, and made a grab for Fliss who wanted to go paddling.
Still the water got higher and Mum and Dad came dripping up the stairs to join me. Out in the front street we could see rescue boats and men in rubber suits helping our neighbours climb out of top windows. Our turn came.
‘Where’s Freckles?’ I cried as I was half way out of the window.
‘Oh no!’ said Dad and went back towards the stairs. He came back carrying an empty fish bowl ‘I found this floating upside down. The water must have carried it off the top of the shelf where I put it and Freckles has swum away!’
‘Come on!’ yelled our rescuers impatiently, and I was hauled into the little boat.
I don’t think anyone saw me crying, there was too much rain.
The rain eventually stopped after another day but it took about a fortnight before we could go back home. Everything was ruined downstairs. I missed Freckles dreadfully and Dad promised he would buy me another fish to replace him, but I knew it wouldn’t be the same.
Mum was reading the local paper when she suddenly said: ‘Look at this. They found a goldfish in one of the goalmouths at the football pitch just as the water was going down. They rescued him and there’s a picture.’
I leant over, spilling my orange juice everywhere in my excitement.
‘It’s Freckles,’ I shouted. ‘He’s survived! We’ve got to go and get him!’
Which is how Freckles was saved and came back to live with me in his big new tank. We still have long conversations but they are much more exciting now. I never get tired of hearing about his swim to the football pitch, but the way he tells it you’d think it had been two hundred miles rather than just two.

•  Judging the competition, Lynne Hackles said she had picked Eden’s ‘well-plotted’ story as it made her laugh out loud..

Shortlisted

Nine to eleven-year old group: Second Prize Ciara Grace Elwis, Kinross; Third Prize: Murdo Elwis, Kinross. Shortlisted: Rowan Ellis, Minster, Kent; Jacob George, York; Angeline Hunt, Lowestoft; Timothy Jasper, Sedgefield, Co Durham; Eve Laycock, Gerrards Cross, Buckinghamshire; Rachel Norman, Pinner, Middlesex; Ella Simpson, Ilkley; Harrison Ward, Leigh-on-Sea, Essex; Ione Wells, Chelsea, London.
Twelve to fifteen-year age group: Second Prize Jenny Messenger, Silloth, Wigton, Cumbria; Third Prize: Anna Horner, Lindfield, Haywards Heath. Shortlisted: Sarah Austen, Cambridge; Stephen Benson, Cardiff; Oliver Bond, Todmorden; Louise Crawford, York; Jack Kennedy, Abernethy, Perthshire; Bridget Leary, Ashwell, Hertfordshire; Elizabeth McLaren, Newmarket; Sarah Morrison, Bromsgrove; Emma Norman, Pinner, Middlesex; Daisy Whittingham, Shifnal, Shropshire